The Spiritual Art of Knowing Oneself
A new day has come as I sit quietly in my room this morning. There is the sunlight coming in through the open window that brings in the fresh, new day. On my mantelpiece, I am observing a beautiful bonsai tree. Do you know what a bonsai is? A tree that is grown by the Japanese method of dwarfing so the tree may live its fullest potential in miniature form. The bonsai tree is truly beautiful and exquisite. Before I arise to begin my day, I simply watch the bonsai with great interest. Letting it fill my whole being. There is not a single thought moving inside of me. There is no one in this body to name as myself. My whole head is completely quiet, totally vacant. There is no ‘me’ watching the bonsai tree, only the full watchfulness, and a total perception without a perceiver. There is such great joy and beauty in seeing this, words cannot explain it. There is no space between the bonsai tree and me, which breeds the great joy within. There is just this complete seeing of the oneness of all things. Any method of the so-called Zen Masters or the Taoists or the New Age people of yesterday or today, do not produce the clarity of this seeing within me. It is pure seeing born of clarity, awareness and silence.
Slowly, I rise from bed to begin my day. Going to the restroom, I see my body in the mirror as if I do not recognize myself. It is as if the body has a life of its own, devoid of a conscious being to direct its actions. Meticulously, I begin to clean the body from head to toe. As a civilized human being, cleanliness is very important not just outwardly but inwardly as well. It is vital that we learn to clean the mind and heart of the past and all its attachments. Especially, the things formed of desire, fear and pain. To live ones life abundantly, there has to be freedom of all attachments and defilements.
Spiritual harmony comes when you are free within.
Throughout the day, there is this intense watching and listening to everything in and around me. In this attentiveness, there is no ‘self.’ There is no conscious ‘self’ that is attentive; there is only this intense sense of attentiveness not formed by any effort. It is complete effortless awareness. Through my eyes, there is just the movement of life flowing harmoniously within me. My whole head is completely unoccupied with past happenings, thoughts and emotions.
So much of ones time may be spent working, going to school or just living a life of leisure. In this life, we all must relate and associate with others. We communicate with each other on so many different levels, not just verbal. In fact, one may listen and watch everyone with great intent. As human beings, we talk but I do not think we ever really listen to the other person or even ourselves. Each one of us has our own agenda, hidden or in the open. There is the usual game of life. Each person pursuing his or her pleasures while avoiding the possibility of getting hurt.
Throughout the day, I wonder do they notice the silence in me. My quietude can be rather intense. Sometimes, I wonder do they see that strangeness through my eyes. Am I that transparent? From my lips to their ears how much is misunderstood? Occasionally, there may be a passing smile between us. At times, I may look away not wanting to see the things they do not want revealed. Do they know I can see through all there illusions? Do they feel the compassion pouring out as if through my skin? For so many of us, the day may seem rather tedious, uneventful and morbid. Without joy within, life can be a great sorrow. Are we ever content? Are we ever happy, truly? Does it have any meaning to tell another that the silence in me is a living joy in which words cannot express?
Spirituality can not be fathomed by thought.
Finally, the busy day is over and it is time to go home. In my room, I can relax in solitude and just listen to what is being said and felt within me. If there are, any thoughts that have formed within, one can listen and watch them completely without the distance between the ‘self’ and the thought. Just observing the movements of the mind like a river flowing, endlessly. There is no desire to continue or end ones thoughts. No matter what the thought, image or feeling that arises in the mind. In this, there is meditation without a meditator. This is the art of knowing oneself by seeing yourself just as you are. Each day, from sunrise to sunset, I am learning who I am, actually. Letting whatever comes, appear in mind without the desire to alter or change what arises. Letting every thought and feeling that appears on the surface of my mind, reach its fullest birth, and live out its essence and die of its own accord. This ending of all thoughts through spiritual meditation is effortless and without desire. Spiritual meditation is the sacred medicine that heals the diseases of the mind and heart. The very ending of oneself is the awakening of that Glory which has no name. That sacredness comes and transforms your life completely. It is the ultimate joy beyond the veil of oneself.
Spiritual Master Adonis Alexander
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