Daily Inspirations Of An Ordinary Human Being

Question:  Can you tell me something concrete about your personal everyday life?

Adonis:  Within the interior of my being, there is this immensity of pure joy in which words cannot describe.  You must see this for yourself.  On the most part, whenever I am not pointing this out to others, I love listening to music, writing poetry and observing the wonders of nature.  Especially, the open skies in the late night. 

I was out walking late last night. There is a beautiful full moon in the sky. Ones whole being is observing this completely quiet.  There is this immensity and tranquility in observing this natural wonder.  Now with me, there is this endless witnessing within.  In this perception, the full moon is within my very being.  There is no 'me' looking at the moon, there is just the purity and illumination of the moon.  No words can explain this seeing.  You must see this for yourself.  

Question:  Will you tell us things about your childhood?

Adonis:  Well, if you are asking biographically, in my childhood I lived in South Florida, which is in the United States.  It is where I grew up most of my life.  Actually, it is where the quietude first began in me as far as I can recall.  In my youth, I was that child who did not talk or interact much with other kids.  The very first so-called spiritual insight that I can recollect was when I was around seven years old, a relative lived on the other side of the forest from where we lived. So one day I was on my way to her house and before I entered the forest, I looked behind me and my great-aunt who had recently died was there in the door watching me.  I could see her face and form standing in the doorway.  She would always sit and watch over me whenever I would be in quietude.  I was not afraid, because when she was alive, she was very beautiful and so kind. 

So, when I entered the forest, I immediately noticed that the silence within me was of the same essence as the silence I could feel in the forest.  It was so peaceful, tranquil and whole.  The pristinity of the forest was so serene and beautiful.  It was then I realized that the outer is the inner.  I realized that I am the trees, the leaves and the open skies.  The thing is I was much too young to understand what was going on inside of me and how I was to relate to all of this.  Eventually, I had to realize that the brain requires a certain maturity to taste the spiritual life.   One needs a certain ripeness.  So, the real question is, why did this childlike brain go into this quietude all by itself, without effort and without a teacher?  Perhaps, that is my own mystery.

Question:  Did you feel strangely different from other children?

Adonis:  Even as a child, I was fully aware that I was not considered common. I knew others saw me as something strange and unusual.  The main factor that I noticed about others is that I could feel they were always full of noise. There heads were always talking.  My head rarely made any noise.  So I felt uncomfortable about ever talking about it.   For some reason I never wanted to speak about it as if there was a certain bother to others to try explaining this silence within me. 

I could experiment with my own consciousness and discover deeper things than on the surface.   Being introverted makes you feel like a laboratory within.  You could really discover everything in your consciousness if you are willing to look and go beyond all limitations.  As a child, I use to have psychic visions and not say a single word!  Once I was at a relative's home and she asked me a question.  She said, 'can you see beyond the physical plane?'  I hesitated and she being very sharp stated, 'I already know you can and do you know how I know?  Because you have been sitting there on that sofa for over an hour with the hot sun beaming on your back and you don’t even feel it, because you are not in your body, are you?  Now tell me what do you see?'  So I said to her, 'Well, if you really want to know, right now there is this Being, he is there on the wall, and supposedly he protects me with his smile and presence by sharing his love.  He is one of the spiritual Beings who watch over me since my childhood.  I never gave them much attention.  They are just as common as seeing anyone else on the physical plane.  But I doubt if you could understand this.'  After I said that, she was not shocked at all.  She just wanted confirmation of what she felt she already knew.  I just left it at that.

Question:  How brilliant that you were able to see and feel beyond the physical plane at such an early age.  I feel for you because you were born in a home where you were unable to fully express yourself and your awakening, openly.  You came into a household where ignorance ruled, therefore it made your awareness very difficult to deal with because you were rapidly awakening to this within you.  Therefore, since the moral support at home was not there for you as a child from others, you learned to absorb this entirely by yourself.  As for me, I was born in a household where my 'spirit' was able to express, fly freely to explore and have no badmouthing at home from loved ones, because all the family including my aunt and grandmother were and still are in the path of enlightenment.  What I saw in my youth, I could always run to mom and express to her my experiences and awakenings and she always had a constructive explanation.  I am glad you have come out to express and share your insights with others.  Do you feel that this is your time to speak to the whole world? 

Adonis:  Of course, it is time for me to point this out to others.  I know there is great resistance and adversities.  I have come so that you may actually see that there is so much ignorance in the world and that very seeing will bring its own transformation within us.  You will see what takes place within you when you look and listen, holistically.  It is going to be an interesting affair to discover all this for yourself. 

Question:  May I ask, what have you been doing today?

Adonis:  Well, right now I am listening with great passion to this song I have on the computer.  It is a wonderful experience to listen to music with ones whole being.  There are moments, I feel so intense, like I am in love with life. Within me, it can become so vast that it is as if I am about to explode from immense joy.  

Presently, I am listening to this Spanish song.  It is so beautiful and expressive that my whole being feels like it is pouring out of me.  I am the song, the singer, the words and the silence between the words.  The silence in me listens to the whole essence of the music and transcends the song.  There is no me, only life, love, beauty, call it what you will, there is no name that can express this immensity.  

Question:  When did you first begin to inquire prudently into spirituality?

Adonis:  By the age of seven, I would have these intense moments of silence.  But my little brain was so young and did not have much understanding of it being anything spiritual. 

Many years ago, I told a friend that by the time he saw me again; I will have discovered the ultimate secret of life.  Did I actually find it?  I do not think what I found could be told to another.  You must see and discover truth for yourself.

During that time, I sat out with absolute conviction that my only concern was to come face-to-face with God.  (If there was such a thing.)  I would not accept anything less than that!  Inexplicably, the whole essence of my being was certain that I could awaken to that essence.  Everyday for about three months all alone I would question, watch, listen and probe every facet of my being and to no avail, I could not discover Truth.  Then one day, look and behold!  I discovered I could not, ever!  That was the turning point!  I know this sounds strange but that is one of the greatest discoveries.  I discovered, the 'I-me-self' could never discover the Truth!  Do you see the beauty in this? 

Suddenly, chills moved all over me.  I had discovered something that would start an intense inquiry within me!  The 'self' cannot awaken, it could never discover God!  The realization, 'I do not know' is the key!  Do you see this? I discovered what very few at any given time, had ever actually discovered. The simple fact is, the seeker, this self that is trying to discover God is the wrong instrument! 'You' can never discover God!  Do you follow this?  I know it is not easy to understand, why I would be overjoyed to discover that I could not do something.  I will show you the significance of this insight. 

You must first, 'know thyself' which is an endless process of asking and pondering; what am I?  Who is the seeker that is searching for God, Truth, and Immortality?  By asking these questions, the nothingness was realized.  No more was I trying to search for God, how could I?  'I' am knowledge; the self is knowledge, that which is known.  God is the Unknown.  This 'self' that I thought I was and God could never meet!  When I awakened to this truth within me every hair on my body stood on end and I cried out in joy!

Truly, it is very simple, which means you must be very watchful or else you will miss the subtlety.  The 'self' must end, which is a psychological death. While you live, 'you' must die!  Not like the Christians interpret it. They think it means to affirm it.  It is not an affirmation or declaration.  You, the 'self,' must actually end, which is an actual psychological death of the ego.  When at once the self dies, your whole being is silent.  Actually, the self does not die; you discover it never had life in the first place!  You are then completely still and empty within.  Because you are empty, completely vacant, that living essence comes in the temple of your being.  Then at once, you will discern the greatest secret of all.  That which I cannot speak of, for there are no words to express this Glory.  No words can speak of it.  Nothing can touch it.  It is the All, the source and the end of all things.

I know exactly what I am doing and what I have come to do in this world. You have no idea what I am and what I have come to do.  If you did, you would be deeply shaken, troubled and morbidly concerned.  Then, when you fully understand, when you least expect it, your darkness will end and that glory will manifest within your very being.

Question:  Is this your destiny being fulfilled?

Adonis:  What is really going to seem strange is that I was aware of this living silence within me since youth.  Why was my head so quiet? That is a vital key!  As a child, I was extremely quiet and I rarely talked to anyone.  I had no need to meditate.  My head would purge thoughts; empty itself intelligently because it just felt so unnatural for my brain to be full of noise as thoughts and imagery.  Therefore, some may ask, what am I?  Perhaps, I am some kind of anomaly, who knows.  It is like being outside of the whole cause and effect circle.  I have no interest in reincarnation, karma, heaven or anything else pertaining to spiritual progress, whatever that is.

SPIRITUALITY OF ADONIS ALEXANDER

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